Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Lisa and the Loebotomy

Image hosted by

Todays news reports that Lisa Loeb will be starring in a new tv series on E! Entertainment Television about moving back to New York City and searching the dating scene for a new mate. I don't know why I found this intriguing enough to write about because I barely know Lisa Loeb. I mean, I know she's a singer, but that's about it. I don't listen to her music and never thought much about her until this morning when I saw the article on

So, here's my open letter to Lisa Loeb:

If you're really looking for a new mate why on God's Earth do you want to televise that fact nationally? Perhaps you're difficult to get along with - why let the public see that up-close and personal? Let them guess. You're a cute girl with cool-looking glasses. That "Girl Next Door" look goes a long way, don't mess it up now.

But if you're really looking for a new mate, come down to Baltimore and hang out with me. I'm crass, rude and unapologetic about the way I live. I have very little interest in the lives of celebrities so you'll get no special treatment from me because of your singer status. In fact, I can't stand "talent." Usually "talent" are just bratty, whiny and super-narcisstic. I can get that in my own mirror thank you very much.

Hang out with me and hang out with real people. People who work for a living. I'll even teach you how to make killer espresso and shave ice.